I was out of deodorant. Well, blame it on procrastination for it has been three days now. Eventually, I succumbed to the dire plea of my restless armpits, begging for dry and fresh skin surface. I was going to buy myself a deodorant during my lunch break that particular day.
Then, there I was, entering Guardian Pharmacy, walked straight to the deodorant aisle, not caring about anything else on sale that day. The only dilemma up until that point was whether to get a deodorant which comes together with a promotion of a tiny can of whitening spray for an addition of RM1, or to get a twin pack of deodorant with a total discount of RM1. Sickening as it may seem, no regular, single, standalone pack was on sale that day. But anyway, it took me like five seconds to decide since I was not going to burst my budgetary that I have in my head since before I left the house that morning. I can’t wait to try the whitening spray when I get home later.
There were two cashier counters but only one was open. There were also two cashiers, one was working and the other one was sitting down doing I don’t know what. One patron was at the active cashier counter, so I queued up behind her. She was buying like eleven items and it took a while. Finally, when all her items were bagged, and the cashier had informed her total tally of RM49.90, she went on asking about an egg frying pan promotion that was stated on flyers posted all over the premise.
The queue grew larger with three more patrons jumping into the bandwagon. The working cashier asked the dormant cashier about the egg frying pan promotion and without even looking, the dormant cashier said, “Go ask the supervisor”. I assumed that the active cashier knew that the supervisor was not around, so she took out an egg frying pan, put it on top of the counter and began reading the same flyer to have an understanding to explain it to the patron. Apparently, as explained by the active cashier, a customer is eligible to purchase the egg frying pan worth RM50 for RM40 if a total purchase of RM45 or more was made in a single receipt.
“So, would you like to purchase this egg frying pan?”, asked the active cashier.
“No thank you”, replied the patron.
I was half cringing. Two more patrons were stupid enough to join the queue.
“Alright, that’ll be RM49.90 please”
“Come to think about it, I think I’ll change my mind. I’ll take the egg frying pan”
The dormant cashier suddenly looked up. There was hope in this world again. I can eventually forget my misery, proceed with my payment at the next counter and get the hell out of there. But it was a false alarm. She looked back down and continued doing her stuff of huge importance.
“All together, that’ll be RM89.90 please”
“Are those batteries? Can I have one of those? Which are the ones that people always use, the AA size or the AAA size?”, asked the devil disguised as a wicked makcik patron, standing in front of me.
She pointed her pathetic finger like a pathetic makcik to the obvious batteries display behind the counter.
My face was already red. The queue grew with more people in it, not knowing that an event of pure evil was happening in front of them.
As I was about to open my mouth and threw out words of unpleasantness, that was when suddenly the dormant cashier became active; she stood up, opened her counter and smiled.
I switched lanes and put my deodorant on top of the counter without saying a word.
“Just one item?”
“Well, I would love to emulate the very nice and kind makcik who was paying before me, but then I realized that it’s not my style! And please, could you be more sluggish?”
I ended up eating a lot. I do that sometimes. I eat a lot when I’m emotionally unstable. I should’ve had my lunch first before going on to buy a deodorant in hell.
Oh my god! I’m a sexist!
Or maybe that was how it’s supposed to be?